Here she is!!!

Well folks, looks like Lydia is getting something I never had growing up...

A SISTER!!!!!!!!!! :) :) :) 

We are so excited to announce that we are expecting a GIRL in September... just after Lydia turns 5... Great birthday gift, don't ya think? ;)

Here she is at 20 weeks... we didn't get many good pictures actually, this is the only half decent profile one we have. Lots of cute legs, feet and hands though! Too funny! She was being very shy... 

We go back for another sonogram in a few weeks I believe, so if I get any pictures that are better I"ll try to share them. 

Enjoy!!

p.s. Yes, she does have a name... and for now, No we aren't sharing... stay tuned til September! ;)

Alexander Francis Walk - A Memoir

This is a blog post detailing the account of our Second Child, Alex, whom we miscarried and now have a VERY special connection with... 
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Shortly after our little boy Josiah turned one year old (May 2007)... we were already eager to continue to grow our family. We conceived our 2nd child quickly and easily (as for us, is usual) and were very excited! I experienced none of the symptoms I did with Josiah...no morning sickness, my energy was fine... I was curious why, but was reassured that sometimes "the second one is just much easier". I didn't think much of it. Around the time we thought I'd be about 8 weeks, we went in for our first sonogram. They found the baby measuring at 6 wks 5 days, and couldn't quite get a heartbeat. They asked us to come back in 2 weeks and it would be easier, so we scheduled for 3 weeks just in case. I was a little worried, but still had hope and trusted it would be ok. When we went back 3 weeks later... the baby was STILL measuring 6 wks 5 days. Although I was now at the 9 week pregnant mark. The doctor told us we were likely miscarrying, and as we left (Michael and I, with Josiah in tow) were devastated. Michael held it together, but I started crying right in the office elevator, where I'm sure strangers were wondering about that. I cried off and on the whole way home, and immediately told Michael "we need to name him." We chose the name "Alex" because it could be Alexander, or Alexandra. Middle name Francis, because that could be Francis (male) or Frances (female). We immediately began mourning our loss of this baby. Not a half hour after my sonogram and upon our return home, I started bleeding. Not sure why it took until 9 weeks, but my body was finally letting go...

It hit me harder at first than it did Michael, but he also soon realized all that we had "lost" and took time to grieve as well. He stayed home from work a few days as I physically went through the process of miscarrying. When I had passed what seemed like, "the baby" I was as wreck and Michael took a baby food jar, placed "him" in there, and we baptized him (mostly for our sake and dedicated him as the Lord's, of course) and we then buried him outside under a newly planted dogwood tree, which my parents got us to remember him by. 

The next day (or so?) I just thought about him and moved in "zombie mode". I took time to create a tiny memorial service, which was just Michael, myself, and both of my parents. We waited until Josiah was asleep one night, went out by the dogwood tree, and said these prayers and words. That was it, it wasn't much, but it was something, to acknowledge this life existed. 

** Heavenly Visions **

Shortly after we miscarried, or while I was even still in the process, my best friend Jess was praying for us. We had been planning a trip to their house that weekend, to ask them to be our new baby's godparents, when all that was cancelled for our trip to the hospital. She told me, hesitantly, (maybe not sure if I'd think she was crazy? ;) about how when she was praying the Rosary, she was meditating on the mystery of Jesus being found in the temple as a young boy. She said she had a "vision" of Alex ... in heaven, he was at what looked like a desk, in a white robe with a gold rope, and he looked "JUST like Josiah... only a little older"  She said he seemed to be saying something similar to those wise words of Christ when he was just a boy, found in the temple... "why are you sad? Do you know know that I'm with my Father?" 

This first vision comforted me tremendously. I knew that our baby was with Jesus, but now I knew that he was a boy, (as I suspected!) and that had sort of a, confirmation, that he was in fact there, and everything was ok. 

This of course did not change my feelings of loss or grief over not getting to hold, see, smell, kiss, my new baby... but I knew that he was with God, and that alone was comforting. 

*** Second Vision ***

Just after the little "memorial service" we held for Alex... which was at night, we were all in bed, but I couldn't sleep. It was very VERY late, and I bundled up at around 1am in the morning, and walked out to "the Alex tree". 
     Even though I knew he wasn't there, I felt this bazaar feeling of how I'd left my baby out in the cold, and that I needed to be with him. I brought a blanket with me, and I knelt down in front of the tree, and I prayed, and cried... and prayed and cried... and prayed and cried... until I felt myself falling alseep outside. So I went back inside and went to bed. NO ONE knew of my visit out to the tree late that night.

The next morning Jess sends me an email and tells me she had another vision of Alex, this time, "you were kneeling next to the Alex tree praying, and he was there, standing beside you" .... 

wow. 

As if there could be more certainty... more precious proof that this little one was with God? I couldn't believe she knew this, something that no one else could have possibly known. 

*** Third Vision ***

We continued to mourn the loss of Alex, but also pray for guidance as to when God wanted us to "try again" to conceive. As we prayed and listened for answers... Jess said to me, "I was praying the Rosary again, and I was meditating on the Nativity, only I had a vision and it wasn't Mary, Joseph and Jesus, it was You and Michael...with a baby." We took this, and other answers to prayer to mean-- December. We tried again and December, and by New Years Day, a pregnancy test confirmed what we already knew... we were also celebrating NEW LIFE!!! :) Our 3rd baby was conceived, and I was nervous, but knew he or she was clearly in God's hands.

*** Fourth Vision *** 

Jess kept this one a secret until we asked... but shortly before we had our 20 week sonogram I told her we were planning to find out the gender of this baby. (We hadn't done so the first time with Josiah.) This time I felt like I just needed something "a little more to hold onto" since I was still nervous about miscarrying again, even though I knew in my heart that wasn't God's plan this time around. Jess said, "I think I already know..."

Then when I called her to tell her the news- "IT'S A GIRL!!!!" :o) She told me "she already knew that because she had a vision ...and it was of me pregnant, with Mary and Alex praying with their hands on my belly...and the baby was a girl."  Ahhh hahaha! Why was I not surprised??? 

This image to this day, still moves me greatly. I can picture it... (and I wish I could paint it or something!) and it makes me so happy to know that Alex was praying for his little sister, and watching over all of us, keeping us in prayer. I'm glad he knows WE ARE HIS and HE IS OURS...even though he is with Jesus, which is of course much better! :)

*** Fifth Vision ***

Recently Josiah received his First Holy Communion... on April 27, 2013. What a blessed and holy day this was!! One of the most precious moments of the day for me came that morning...

Josiah and I had to leave the house early to arrive at the church for portraits and to line up early before Mass with the other kids. I was SO NERVOUS for everything in the day to "go right" and I realized I needed to settle down, pray, and enjoy the moment. I told Josiah, "well, I guess we better pray..." So we prayed our morning offering prayers that we typically pray together each day (in the car) and we also asked intercession of some of the Saints and we included "Alex... pray for us!" 

Probably about 10-15 minutes later when the portraits were done and we were just waiting for everyone else to arrive, I got a text message from Jess. It read,

"Offered my Rosary for Josiah this morning and while praying final joyful mystery I 'saw' Alex with Josiah beside him as he received communion. Thought you'd like to know..."

I could hardly believe it... we'd just prayed and talked to Alex, asked for his prayers this day, and then I was reassured from Heaven that he'd be right beside our family this day, rejoicing in Josiah's First Holy Communion with him. What a blessing and honor!


       I'm sure there have been other visions that Jess has had of Alex, I may not have them all listed here but I'll do my best to keep updating this too, with other awesome times that Alex intercedes on our behalf. Needless to say, we are thankful and honored to have had him in our lives the brief time that we did, and even though we don't understand it this side of heaven, we know God has/had big plans for his life! He is now a heavenly advocate for our family, and will always be a party of us. 

We love you, Alex! 

Photo Update! Family Activities February

I'm fairly certain no one follows this blog anymore... or really, ever did? ;o) BUT... I figure I'll still keep posting for the rare person who does check this... maybe? :) Oh wait, I think my husband might check it! that's encouraging at least! I could write him love notes! Ok, don't worry, I won't turn my blog into mushy love notes... tempting though. :)

So... what to write. It's Lent. I'm doing terribly. At LENT that is. I just haven't had the time, energy, or motivation this year, and I feel badly about that really, but I'm not sure how to fix it. I think I will try to do better in personal prayer time for the rest of Lent. That is what I seem to be hearing most from God (read: on the rare occasion I'm still long enough to hear God speak to me.) Just PRAY. if you spend time in PRAYER, you can be the Christian that He's calling you to be. I heard a great talk last night by Fr.Pat, the Priest who witnessed our marriage and baptized Josiah (6 yrs ago- phew!) and it was such a pleasure to see and hear him. He reminded me of those things again... to be the Christian God's calling you to be, you must pray. A personal, loving, relationship with Jesus is what you need. What you need to feel the courage and grace and strength for what He's calling you to be. So... there is my second-half-of-Lent goal. pray more!

In the meantime, what else is new? Little pumpkin (okay, orange?) is about 12 1/2 weeks now, hooray! I get a bonus sonogram today which I'm SUPER excited about. Love getting to see this little one grow! :) ** Photos from this will have to come later ;)

The other little clowns are doing wonderful too. They are just so fun and sweet. Let's see... photo update!

Baby Henry- sweet, lovable, squishy, LAUGHS a lot (turns out his middle name means Laughter, how perfect!) almost 8 months now!

Hi baby boy! here is proof your mommy exists- I took a picture of me with you ;o) 

Benjamin turned 3!!!! 

He had a few friends over for PIZZA, CHOCOLATE MILK, CAKE and ICE CREAM! 

(all his choices, of course!) 

  On Benjamin's actual birthday since it wasn't TOO horribly freezing, we bundled up and took a walk to the playground- hooray!!

Henry rode the slide for the FIRST time! (with big brother assistance) ;o) 

Henry on the slide.... 

I love this picture... looks like he's saying, "BOOYAH!! what's up!?" haha. so cute.

3 climbin' crazies

being silly 

 Perhaps one of the BEST birthday pictures. Grandma and Grandpa got Benjamin some dress ups for his birthday. Daddy said, "MAKE  A FIREMAN FACE!" LOL ... oh man, Ben, hilarious! Michael just loved this pic!

He also got some elmo boots- and a super cool McQueen shirt from Nana!

...and a new copy of his favorite book!! (The first copy was unfortunately destroyed in a "read-this-book-right-before-bed-then-wet-the-bed" incident... oops!) 

On President's Day when Grandma had off work (and Daddy!) we all went to the aquarium! 

Hey handsome Josiah... 

Henry playin'

All playin'! 

HEY it's ALL OF US!!! This happens so rarely- enjoy! ;o) 

Michael and I also hosted a CHERISH marriage retreat at our parish recently, it was a great success!!! This is probably the coolest picture of the evening, my Dad's veggie tray he made for us! So cool! thanks Dad :) 

Alright... that's all for now. I'll try to be back soon :) 

The Cherry on top!

"Just when we thought life couldn't get any sweeter..."

God had something sweet in store for this new year. 

Please keep us in your prayers as we joyfully anticipate the arrival of our newest little one, due mid-September! Lydia's praying for a sister, Ben wants "another boy!" so... at least I will please one of them! :) 

Once I know more (like gender and cute 20 week pictures) we will share... for now...

say hello to our newest little miracle.

(9 weeks new!)

The Blessing of Friends!

We recently had a spontaneous super fun weekend with one of our best friends, the R family. We love them all so much and cherish their friendship, and we are so blessed to have them in our lives! Thankfully they put up with us for a couple days, and we were able to visit with them and their 4 beautiful children.

Here's Michael with Henry (left) and our godson Luke! Luke is 8  mo, Henry is 4 (in this pic) and they are the same size, teehee! Yes my best friend makes teeny babies and I make huge ones ;) 

The big kids all had SUCH a great time together being silly and just playing and playing! 

Leah, Lydia, Josiah, Megan

Who knew so much love and so many miracles could grow out of our two families?? When we first met it was just their oldest Leah, and Josiah and they were just 2 months old.... 

Now look how we've grown! :) 

Leah with Luke, Lydia, Josiah with Henry, Megan, Benjamin, Peter

The one time they all settled down a bit, thanks Backyardigans! ;) 

Megan (our goddaughter) and Lydia, having some lunch and some girl time! ;)

Field Trip! Walters Art Museum

Also in October we had a field trip to the Walters Art Museum, where Josiah took a class called "Art Detectives!" He learned SO much and came out talking about museum conservators. I was so proud of him and I'm glad we all had a good time. Daddy was able to meet us there mid-day and then spend the rest of the day with us, which was just icing on the cake. 

I can't remember the older child's name, but Henry was charming these fellow homeschool boys who came to visit him. They were making him smile and then one little boy said, "He has the best smile ever! I love how his eyes get all squinty!" haha. Adorable :)

We ran into our friends Matthew and MaryAnne which was also a pleasant surprise! (brown shirt and rainbow jacket) Josiah and Lydia (white shirt with flowers) were building with blocks before his class began.

Josiah built this fantastic castle/garden/fortress thing.... Definitely could be an architect one day, right? ;)  

I got a quick shot of Josiah's class (he's in the back you can't really see him!) before they went off to explore and learn. 

Daddy with all the kiddos in the "Knight" room!

cool insect display- beautiful butterflies!

Short but Sweet! Soccer Season 2012

Josiah played soccer again this year, he was on the purple team. But since he broke his ankle after the first couple practices, he wasn't able to make most of the practices or games this season. He is finally all healed up and he was able to play goalie for the last 2 games of the season. He loved it and did a great job!

Warming up before the 1st of his 2 games left in the season.

got it!

Grandpa and Ben- his cheerleaders in the FREEEZING cold! haha

Josiah in action!

Way to go my goalie!